


on quiet nights I hear you speak

by alitaire



Series: a step forward then away [1]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Byleth did not sign up to become a therapist, F/M, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Blue Lions Route, Post-Time Skip, Secret Relationship, but she chose the Blue Lions and isn't that the same thing really?, onesided dimileth, some Golden Deer spoilers, this is the first fic I've finished writing in years
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-08
Updated: 2019-09-08
Packaged: 2020-10-12 08:46:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20561522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alitaire/pseuds/alitaire
Summary: “Do you really have to leave?”Dimitri stops short of knocking on the door when he hears the voice of his dear professor speaking to someone.Why is she awake so late?





	on quiet nights I hear you speak

“Do you really have to leave?”

Dimitri stops short of knocking on the door when he hears the voice of his dear professor speaking to someone. He had kicked himself out of bed, restless from nightmares, and went to her, hoping for comfort as the thought of their impending march on Enbarr loomed in his mind. Claude had been kind enough to offer lodgings for the Kingdom army on his estate in Derdriu before he left Fódlan and now, here Dimitri was standing in front of the Professor’s modest room.

_ Why is she awake so late? _

“You know I have my own dreams to fulfill.”

_ Claude? _ But the man’s voice was more tired and subdued than Dimitri had ever heard it. Even when the man had announced the dissolution of the Alliance, there was a certain levity and assuredness to his words. Like he had planned for this outcome. 

_ And I thought he had left? _

“I do,” a sigh from the Professor before she says more quietly, “...I’m sorry I couldn’t help you achieve them.”

There’s a creak, like the sound of a bedframe, and Dimitri is suddenly aware of how he is still standing with his hand frozen in mid-knock, eavesdropping on the two. He doesn’t move.

“Hey, you’re doing plenty by staying by Dimitri’s side and pulling him out of… whatever he was going through,” there’s a pause before Claude’s voice continues gently. “Thank you for that by the way. So many old friends have died in this war and I thought I would have to mourn another when I saw him back on Gronder.”

Another creak. “It was hard. But he’s gotten a lot better. I’m proud of him.”

“By… don’t you think they rely too much on you?” The warmth Dimitri felt at the Professor’s words evaporate at Claude’s.

_ Since when were they close enough for him to address her like that? And us, reliant on the Professor? Certainly, no one else has her mind for tactics or her skills as a commander but— _

“If you’re so worried, you could join us so we finally have a tactician,” her tone is… teasing. Dimitri hasn’t heard that lilt to her voice in over five years.

“Alas my fair lady, I cannot grant that wish. And besides, I would say you’ve been doing a great job. Haven’t lost yet, right?” He can imagine the cheeky smirk on the former duke’s face as the Professor sighs, sounding fond. 

The two are silent for a minute before the Professor speaks again, “Claude… do you remember that night at the Goddess Tower?”

“Not sure Teach, we shared a lot of meaningful nights— _ ow _!” 

“_ Claude _.”

“Sorry sorry.” Dimitri bites back a grimace at how unapologetic he sounds. “Do you mean during the ball?” 

“Yes, I… sometimes I wonder what if.”

“What if?”

“What if I had chosen your house?” There’s a bark of laughter at that from Claude, but even as Dimitri listens, it sounds hollow.

“If you had chosen the Golden Deer huh. Well, half the students joined your class anyways, so you were pretty close,” Claude says, his tone light.

“I wasn’t trying trying to _ steal _ them,” she sounds almost exasperated like they’ve covered this topic before. “Marianne and Lysithea decided for themselves. Leonie was determined to protect me after… after _ that _and wasn’t Hilda—”

“I know I’m just teasing.” The professor huffs a little and Claude sighs tiredly. “You know, every day since I got that letter, I’ve been cursing myself for not finding you first.”

“If you had found me first, I wouldn’t have had to carry these burdens,” her voice is soft, barely audible. “But then, Dimitri may have died. And with him, the Kingdom. Maybe this was for the best.”

“Maybe,” Claude sounds equally subdued and there’s another creak. Dimitri’s mind whirls. Are they embracing? Kissing? Or even—

“It’ll be hard to talk for a while,” muffled as it is, Claude’s voice is sad. “Our usual letter route won’t work.”

_ They’ve been communicating through letters? Since when? _ Dimitri recalls often seeing the Professor writing late into the night in the library, in the conference room, in her quarters, often accompanied by Hilda. _Had those been letters for Claude? Has she been sending him letters this entire time? _

“Your scheming can’t get through Fódlan’s Throat?” There’s a hint of playfulness to her voice now.

“I’ll have you know my schemes can get through any obstacle! The Locket though… getting letters from one side to the other would take more resources than I have at the moment. But I swear you’ll hear back from me as soon as possible. Maybe even before you take Enbarr.” He can practically _ hear _the wink that doubtlessly accompanies Claude’s words.

“...I’ll miss you.” There’s the sound of shifting and more creaking, and Dimitri feels that he should have stopped and left a long time ago. 

“Byleth… when you’ve won, you should come and visit me. I’ll show you around like I promised.”

“I would love to,” her voice is so quiet but so full of a soft joy that Dimitri finally wretches himself away from the door. His walk is as quiet as he can manage at the near sprint he’s at in his haste to escape the words he should not have heard.

Dimitri is not a dreamer. He does not have great aspirations or plans for what will happen once the war has ended. But as of late, he’s had… a sort of hope. He hopes of standing before the people Faerghus, the people of the former Alliance, and the people of what would have been the Empire. Hopes of them cheering as he stands proudly, pledging to atone and to bring peace in the name of all who had been lost. 

And most of all, he hopes to see her at his side. Not as his professor, but as an equal. 

_ How long has she held on to these burdens? _

_ How long ago did she decide that she could not trust me with them? _

_ How much longer must _ I _ burden her? _

With these thoughts storming in his mind, the king thinks as he watches another dawn rise on Fódlan.

**Author's Note:**

> Look, I like Dimitri, but he was endlessly frustrating to watch bumble about and I ended up spending most of my time in BL missing Claude and commiserating with Hilda who was honestly a highlight in the BL route. Her monastery dialogue was pretty much me the entire time.
> 
> if you want to yell at me (or with me) leave a comment or chat me on twitter @tesereil


End file.
